Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(352): View more from Florida

What are you doing?

(352): View more from Florida

High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...

(352): View more from Florida

That guy could sell me cancer.

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(561): View more from Florida

i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.

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(650): View more from California

I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.

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(801): View more from Utah

I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.

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(904): View more from Florida

I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox

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(501): View more from Arkansas

It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.

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(315): View more from New York

i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake

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(757): View more from Virginia

Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......

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(204): View more from Manitoba

I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.

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