Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
So squirting runs in the family.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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