Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
ttyl tear gas
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
