From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
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