Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(843): View more from South Carolina

all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?

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(305): View more from Florida

So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates

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(773): View more from Illinois

Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals

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(815): View more from Illinois

It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

I party with great urgency now.

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