Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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