can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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