i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize