well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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