I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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