Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
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