I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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