she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize