This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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