the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
