I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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