I hate all girls vehemently.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
