i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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