You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize