Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I am one with the molecules
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
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