I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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