ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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