how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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