I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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