she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
