is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize