so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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