after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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