Have you finally orgasmed yet?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I just had sex on a roof
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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