Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
