they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
