Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize