I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
