i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
now i know why i became what i already was.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
