I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
This is my gift to your gina
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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