I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
