Pappa wants mamma naked
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
what day is it and did you see me today?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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