He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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