end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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