I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize