Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize