giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
