i don't like sucking hair
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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