The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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