White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Please don't give away my fajitas
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
