Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
