There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
