Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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