You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
