I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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