a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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