Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
