Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
