Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
When did angry sex become our thing?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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